[HP-Ficlet] Allowances

[misanagi]

Allowances

Fandom: Harry Potter
Rating: PG
Characters: Sirius and James. Hints of slash
Words: 331

Sometimes Sirius stares.

He's quite aware that he's doing it but it doesn't stop him from fixing his eyes on his best friend and just looking. Sometimes it's alright, even expected, like when James is flying through the air, Quaffle in hand and dodging Bludgers, or when he's explaining the plan for a prank and they all listen attentively.

But then again, Sirius stares in History of Magic, or when James lounges in bed reading or sometimes even when he sleeps and Sirius knows that somehow this is not alright.

Or maybe it is, because it is James and things with James have their special rules, their special allowances, maybe it's not strange at all.

So he keeps staring and he starts noticing things, like the way James' eyes change color when he's excited, the special smile he reserves only for Sirius, the scratches and bruises on his skin he tries so hard to hide from Remus after a full moon… or the small purse of his lips after he receives yet another distant letter from his father.

And he knows he can stare and see these things because James allows him to. He trusts Sirius and he lets him see the hidden depths others can't be allowed to glimpse.

In return Sirius lets James see. He tries not to hide the family problems, the damage, the sadness and James not only stares but bursts right into Sirius' space and pulls him away from there, pulls him into his own space, into himself and holds tight.

Sirius holds back. He has never been held before and he clings to James because James has given him everything and Sirius can be who he wants to be because James gave that to him.

So he stares, because he's James' and in the same way James is his. James gave himself to Sirius the moment he saved him and Sirius claimed him gladly.

Sometimes James catches him staring... he just smiles and stares back.

Comments

[mindabbles.livejournal.com]

Aw, this is just adorable!!

[misanagi.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much!

[decor-noctis.livejournal.com]

Lovely!

[misanagi.livejournal.com]

Thank you!

[firstillusion.livejournal.com]

James not only stares but bursts right into Sirius' space and pulls him away from there, pulls him into his own space, into himself and holds tight.
That's where I almost choked up.

Lovely little piece.

[misanagi.livejournal.com]

Thank you! I'm so happy that you liked it!

[mtranc3.livejournal.com]

I loved this sentence:

In return Sirius lets James see. He tries not to hide the family problems, the damage, the sadness and James not only stares but bursts right into Sirius' space and pulls him away from there, pulls him into his own space, into himself and holds tight.

What a fitting way to describe James and Sirius' relationship! <3

[misanagi.livejournal.com]

Thank you! I'm so glad that you think it worked.

[megans-writing.livejournal.com]

that was so awesome.

[misanagi.livejournal.com]

*gins* Thank you! I'm glad that you liked it.